10-year old hero

So this 10-year old boy from Florida is out fishing with some friends as his fishing line suddenly snaps, and an annoyed, 5'6'' big alligator travels up to the surface, obviously having the hook in his mouth. More then thoroughly pissed, the alligator had attacked the boy, who started beating at it with sticks, hopped up on it's back, subdued it and dragged it, alive, back home without anything more then some scratches. As he got home, his grandfather called the wildlife officials and the county sheriff, and afterwards he had given the boy a serious talk about that if he had been older he would have been arrested for felony, and the other people, when they arrived did the same.

I myself believe this to be complete bullshit, and we should almost make a holiday in remembrance of this brave 10-year old boy. Do you know of the saying "Kill a deer with a stick"? That's a pretty fucking hard thing to do. And this boy did something harder, he subdued a Big effing alligator with a stick, and Dragged it back home from where he had fished with his friends. He's more of a man then most people on this world will ever be. When he grows up to be an old man, he'll be one of those that sits by their front door with a big beer flask and a shotgun beside him, and survives the zombie apocalypse.

This is our Hercules, and I applaud him. Good fight, little boi!

OMG I am here again! And very bored.

Yes, my followers, admirerererers, and worshippers. I, your not-so-almighty-and-nerdy-god has returned. As I have told you before, the frequence of my posting will be heavily changeable depending on my mood and damn this delicate eposide of Seinfeld, airing at 02:00 AM is making me so distracted I have no idea what to say in this small, insignificant post. What has happened in my life since last time? Nooo, I have told myself that I shall not defile this blog with boring facts about my private life. So what will this be about? I don't know. I guess I could check the news about retarded things that might have happened. Or I could just go onto Youtube and frag-steal one of Fluffee's rants. Either way, I do not feel like it.

WHY oh why God almight in the sky have you made this such a disturbingly hard, yet somewhat fashionably desireable task as to post strange blogs on the internet, so disturbingly hard, yet somewhat fashionably desireable? Have you seen the latest topquality games for the PS3? I have. But I do not buy the newest, because most of them are first person shooter games. That is another one of God's major failures. I do not mind first person shooter games. But why on God's green earth did he make them so popular that they were almost the only games available for purchase? On a PS3? Those things are supposed to be played on the computer, with a mouse and WASD!

Oh well, I guess I have succeeded in wasting away 5 minutes of your precious time. 5 minutes you will never get back.

Lover died in chimney

Yeah, I know that laughing and trash-talking someone's death not always is an accepted thing. But, since this is supposed to be my surreal reality, and since this blog is about the egomaniacal me, I will do so anyway. Posts like these may pop up every once in a while.

In the news today, a lover wanted to suprise the cheating husband by climbing down his chimney and appear in his living room. However, she got stuck, died and then the cheating husband's babysitter found her three days later dead.

Now the first thing I have to mention, is how can someone be so stupid to Climb down a chimney to surprise the husband, get stuck and then Not call for help? If I would choose, I would rather shout out and let them know that the husband was cheating. After all, it wasn't I who was breaking the law. ...Selling sex isn't against the law is it? 

No matter, the basic is that I could go for hours about this stupid thing, so I won't even try, I mean, just look at it.

You know what, I don't even think she climbed down the chimney to surprise her lover, I think it was just the excuse he made because he was too ashamed to admit the truth. Yeah, I think that they had sex in the livingroom and then they heard his wife getting home and got panic. It would all be like:

"Shit! She's home alraedy?"
"Oh no! Hide me, quick!" And then he would look around and go like.

"Hide in here, quick!" And he pushes her up in the chimney, and then he doesn't remember anything about her because he is quite old according to the article, and then she stayed there for three days slowly vaporizing into the air.

But seriously, you know what the worst thing is? That she was there for three days and wasn't found until the babysitter felt the stench of something rotten in the room and checked the chimney. I feel bad for that person, it must have been hard for her to stick her head in the chimney, look up and see rotten legs and whatever is inbetween them *shudders wildly* Ugh!

What was the reason that she did this? To surprise him, yes, but not in the way one thought. He had started avoiding her and as she was desperate for him she was forcing her way, and apparently he had noticed that she was climbing up on his roof, which begs the question; What kind of sick mind as aware that a person climbs down their chimney, and when they don't appear in the house, acts like normal? I mean, if I had someone going up on my roof, not going down, and then heard shouts down the chimney, I'd pretty much notice.

But to be serious, none of the two people involved in this story was married, even though it would be hilarious if they were. I mean, cheating is not a good thing, but if you have to, then at least cheat properly.

Don't use chimneys! Use protection!

Surreal Reality was here.

Just... random bullsh*t.

So here I am, my brain stripped naked of ideas to write, and it irks me beyond comprehension that it always happens to me. During these past few days I have had a selection of things to write about, no doubt were they all both egomaniacal And self-proclaimed bestsellers. However, everytime I have thought about posting it here on this wonderful place in space, the ideas have always eluded me and escaped my minds grasp.

This is why I know write about seemingly nothing, but at the same time something. One can say that this text is merely filters for me so that I will prove myself able to handle the unbearable responsibility of having a blog. For it comes not without responsibility. But, one might also ask themselves, if a blog brings responsibility, then then where is the counterpart that gives you power?

We all know the saying "With great powers comes great responsibility". And that is true. If one would somehow get the ability to shake the worlds to it's foundation with a simple chord setting and a beautiful voice, or perhaps move the minds of the people with a book of outstanding scripture, or unite the now-alive generations under one emotion with an epic scenery, one also has the responsibility to only do so when it is accurate, or maybe not do it at all, depending on what it is one can do.

But at the same time, people all around this flat planet (which isn't very flat, mind you) might time over time find themselves with an unnatural portion of responsibility, but no power to acommodate it. Students gets the responsibility to do their homework, but no power to pass it by. People that die in wars, doing what their duty towards their country, the responsibility as a soldier, mostly finds their power to be waiting in heaven.

So I salute all people with massive amounts of responsibility but no power, and dedicate this post to them. It also seems I have gone off-track, and since it's food time now (hamburgers with no bread and potatoes -not smashed-), I will have to take my leave. Avoid people who bite you.

Surreal Reality was here.

I've heard about gaming addictions, but... Ratchet and Clank?!

So here I am, I have just finished eating my breakfast, and the same feeling I had yesterday when I first arrived at my father's house thrusted itself violently through my body as I've been hit by a lightning of addiction. I want to play the game "Ratchet and Clank: A Crack in Time".

I can not understand why! I have completed the game thrice, And I've gotten all theachievments a PS3 owner Can get to that awesome game. But still the desire to see our Lombax hero run around with his tail wiggling, and having some big gun in his hands blowing stuff up, apparently that decire does not want to leave me. So I decided I should share with you what I know about the game. However, since story-lines changes depending on what game it is, and since background-searching would take too long for my poor, well-used fingers to write down upon this laptop (Yes, father, I am using your laptop), I will only give you the information about the 5 characters I find worthy of mentioning: The hero. The other hero (not sidekick mind you), the mad robotic scientist, the mad robotic scientist's robotic butler, aaaaand the idiot.

Ratchet: Don't get me started on him. Isn't he cute, running around with his big fluffy ears and a lion-inspirated tail and a rocket launcher, shooting at unsuspecting enemies. Or why not shoot at civilians? Their immunity to weapons and their incapability of flying sky-high is clear, but still they well either get annoyed, frustrated, or scared. And the fact that Ratchet is the last Lombax in the universe is a good way spicing up storylines, and the matter that he's only 5 feet tall doesn't seem to bother me.
Clank: Of course! The smallest dude in the game, this robot has a soouulll *ghostly music plays* Anyway, this trusty robot hero of the game, always strapped upon Ratchet's back ready to act as a hovering tool for larger gaps, or a helicopter for going higher then normal, or to just translate the language... nerd. Allthough, not much of this is happening if he's getting kidnapped by flying things that apparently knows how to teleport things. His dry humor is always fun to see, and even when by himself, this small character can pack a punch.

Dr. Nefarious: Evil, mad genious robotic scientist all in one package. From being completely quiet and thinking to himself, to go to yelling directly into someone's face, without the need of shower inbetween, this man has got it all you expect from the antagonist. He even crashes when he gets worked up, and freezes in place, his robot brain, instead of working as the office of fixing his body to work as it should, it sends out the classical radio drama series "Lance and Janice", and the only cure is the smack on the head, most often by his trusty... butler, Lawrence.

Lawrence: Satire, sarcasm and everything else you expect from a butler. He's unimaginably mean to Nefarious, and sometimes he screws the biggest plans up deliberately. Still he always saves his master, despite the fact that he hates his job. There are also rumors of him being homosexual, and a little male to male robotic kindness is always a plus in a game. Hey, we all know it is! It shows that Insomniac is open-minded.

Captain Copernicus Leslie Qwark: Big muscles, smallest brain and clumsiest coordination you can see. In so many ways is he the classical hero is in reality is nothing but a failure. Somehow still, he has tons of fans, and in the upcoming games, he's even the galactical president! But still, either if it is by his astounding way of declaring that it is a good day to die, since he's got clean underwear, only to when they are safe, say "So much for clean underwear", or if it is his astoundingly failed way to dress up as the "lovely nurse Shannon" and still successfully go undercover, one have to admire his feats. Even though he doesn't go into an adventure by himself, still this man voluntarily goes into an adventure, if pressed up against the wall about the subject, and his plans for infiltrating evil impenetrable head-shaped fortress filled with traps and windows are a must for a succeeded mission. The fact that his plans always goes wrong the moment he says "mission accomplished", which he does all the time, is soon a thing of the past.

Phew, that was a lot. I wrote this hoping it would take off some of my Ratchet and Clank fever so I could play some other delicate game. I do not think it has worked, it has simply wanted me to play more. But thanks to my stone-hard discipline, and possibly my need of getting something else stone-hard a bit softer, I will run to the shower and clean up! And then, to eternity, and beyond!

...Wrong quote, wasn't it?

So here it is! My own blog!

This is awesoooome! Or is it?

I don't know, what do you think? What you mean, what do I think? I'm you, jerk.

Ok, no need to get feisty. So, what will the subject of today be? Well what do you think? Of me creating this blog, of course!

Today, I woke up, and I felt like I had nothing to do. So it popped into my mind: "Let's to a blog that will never be well-known, and spend our time on that one!" I must admit, the thought has crossed my mind earlier. But alas, with the hard editing you have to be doing, it is a wonder anyone wants to so such a thing.

I will warn you, that this blog has non-schedueled posting. It might happen that I won't be posting anything for several days! I can also be posting more then once in only 10 minutes! Even the possibility that I will forget to post alltogether can arise, and I wouldn't be surprised if that was the case.

Still, stay tuned for future postings, cuz now I'm off for final preparations, before the moving to another parent begins! *Epic Star Wars-like theme plays*